CHUCK -

LYNNE - wait.. what????? 4 topless women robbed you.. on your BIKE??

http://www.tcpalm.com/news/2008/sep/29/stuart-man-clams-five-women—four-wearing-suspend/?feedback=1

MARK - My kick ass today goes to the editors of Entertainment Weekly.  They recreated in detail the New Yorker cover depicting Barack and Michelle Obama as terrorists.  Instead of the presidential candidate and his wife they used Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert.  Brilliant – and worthy of a kick ass

CHUCK - I saw Sigur Ros on Saturday night at Red Rocks and I was pleasantly surpised to find 9000 other people who share my love for this quirky band from Iceland. It was one of the best nights I’ve ever spent on the Rocks. 

LYNNE -This shoplifter stuffed 19 items down her pants.. hmm a bit much I would say…

http://www.nwitimes.com/articles/2008/09/27//news/top_news/doc963d18902a93d3d8862574d0007cc2d0.txt

MARK - I don’t know how significant this is – but a group of UCLA mathematicians as discovered a 13 million digit prime number.  A prime number being a number that can only be divided by itself or the number 1.  75 computers running Windows XP helped in the endeavor.  For their efforts they will probably get to split a $100,000 prize awarded by a science foundation that is trying to promote cooperative computing on the web.  For some reason, I think that kicks ass!

CHUCK - Mark’s Mash Up today was particularly genius - Check it out on our Morning show page here..
You can also hear a bunch of his past mash ups as well. Huzzah Mr. Samansky. Huzzah indeed.

LYNNE - Okay.. I don’t think this is the look they were going for when they made mascots for the HIGH FIVE LOTTERY….

MARK -  I gatta tell ya – pound for pound, dollar for dollar, Robert “Ice Man” Evans totally kicks ass.   Yesterday in the span of 7 hours the homeless Boulder man was hit by a car and then a train.  Evans says he was struck by a car late Wednesday night.  The driver took off.  Since Evans has no insurance he was forced to self medicate himself with copious amounts of whiskey.  Around 4:30 in the morning he was walking his bike across the railroad tracks when a locomotive hit him and threw him 20 feet in the air.  Evans landed in a ditch.  He’ll be okay.  The police officer who found him suggested Evans buy a lottery ticket because “you are one of the luckiest sons of bitches I have ever seen!”

CHUCK - Woody Paige’s article in today’s Denver Post kicks ass. Broncos center and should be sure-fire Hall of Famer Tom Nalen is out the rest of the season with knee issues. At 38 there’s a good chance he won’t be back next year. This is the last remaining member of the Super Bowl winning squads from the late 90’s. And he is a Man. It will be sad if we’ve seen the last of Nails.

LYNNE -Rick who works at Discount Muffler at 4300 E. Evans Kicks Ass! Rick heard me lament about my check engine light being on in my car - and offered to have me bring down my car so he could check it for free! Yippee! Thank you Rick - turns out the gas cap wasnt  on all the way… how embarrassing!

MARK - I think Stephanie Ward and Angie Larson of the Deer Creek Animal Hospital kick ass.  They helped save a wounded bobcat that was hit on C-70 near Morrison.  It is an 8-month-old female weighing in at 20 pounds.   Lakewood animal control officer Jamie Johnston said the cat wanted nothing to do with her rescuers.  “She was very feisty and alert, doing what she needed to be doing – protecting herself.”  Johnston was able to get a catch pole around the bobcat’s neck and brought her to the vets.  Both her back legs were broken but after a little surgery she is on the mend and will eventually be released to an animal sanctuary near Larkspur.  

CHUCK - This trailer for the new James Bond movie looks AWESOME!!! Brang it on, yo!
Quantam of Solace trailer

LYNNE -If you’re a spy who plans to use a fake mustache to disguise yourself for a TV interviewer, make sure your cunning plan involves enough adhesive

Click Here

MARK - The kids in my neighborhood kick ass.  A bunch came by yesterday evening and asked if they could see our cats.  Whenever our big male tabby “Oscar” and our black female “Liddie” are in the backyard the kids act like the cats are celebrities or something.  They all have dogs so the cats seem like exotic creatures.   I brought the cats out on the porch and the kids had a blast petting and talking to them.  Oscar and Liddie loved the attention.

CHUCK -At the last Rockies game of the season at Coors Field on Sunday I saw the greatest homemade sign ever. ‘Just Wait Til Last Year’. Perfect. 

 LYNNE - who the hell wants to wear clothes in the shower!

Clothes in the shower

MARK - My kick ass today goes to the genius software geeks who are developing all sorts of new apps for the iPhone.  Basically these programs will turn your iPhone into a complete multi-track recording studio!  I wanna know what planet are these guys really from?

CHUCK - This is a kick ass with a very short lifespan. It’s International Talk Like a Pirate Day. Now I say this is short-lived not because it will only last this one day. No, it’s lifespan of kick-assery is brief because once someone actually starts to talk like a pirate, it no longer kicks ass. it just gets stupid. But in concept alone, International Talk Like a Pirate Day kicks ass. Just don’t actually talk like a pirate…cause you’ll look more like an idiot that you already do.

LYNNE - The fact that I now feel safe putting up Halloween decorations ( without my neighbors scorn) kicks ass!

MARK - My kick ass today goes to Isabella, the beautiful Golden Retriever who has taken on the task of nursing three baby lion cubs.  The cubs were born at a private zoo in Kansas.  For some reason the mother rejected her newborn.  It just so happened that Isabella, who belongs to the zoo owners, had recently finished nursing her newborn puppies.  The owners took a chance and introduced the lion cubs to Isabella.  The dog’s motherly instincts took over and she has been keeping the cubs alive for several weeks

CHUCK - Hard to find something more engaging than a cartoon bear that shits out prime numbers. http://alpha61.com/primenumbershittingbear/

LYNNE - Man gets sentenced to prison for threatening to blow up the San Francisco Tribune newspaper. There is no such newspaper

http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/c/a/2008/09/16/BAS712UH7G.DTL

MARK - Even though I think he exhibits severe douche tendencies, I have to admit Ryan Seacrest kicks ass.  He turned what was originally a minor role on American Idol into a major part of the show.  Now he does syndicated radio and produces a lot of the programs on E!,  including the brain dead fake reality show Keeping Up With The Kardashians.  The ability for someone to get a show on TV about a family of people who’s only common trait is that they all share the same vacant look in their eyes kicks ass

CHUCK - One of our listeners, Laura from Denver, thinks she has stumbled across the 2nd funniest headline ever: Fired Stripper Gets Tased. Pretty genius but definitely not the greatest headline ever. That title goes to Woman Riding Donkey Fights Off Lion with Machete.

LYNNE- Not news: Police called to house for domestic violence. News: Wife tries to run over deputy with mini-van. Fark: Woman misses deputy, hits lawn mower, falls out and is run over by her own mini-van

http://www.firstcoastnews.com/news/topstories/news-article.aspx?storyid=118770&catid=15

MARK - Lance Armstrong is back and he’s kickin’ ass.  He and his team “Livestrong,” won the 12 Hours of Snowmass yesterday.  Armstrong has come out of retirement and plans to compete in next year’s Tour de France.  Can he win an 8^th title?  Armstrong’s coach says, “I wouldn’t bet against him”

CHUCK - All is right in the world. The Coen Brothers have a new movie out.
http://www.burnafterreading.com–live.com//home

LYNNE - SO.. wait size does matter??

http://www.int.iol.co.za/index.php?set_id=1&click_id=15&art_id=nw20080911122421198C156995

MARK - I’ll tell ya what kicks ass – The group of over the top ladies known as The Denver Roller Dolls.  Thanks to Sports Racer,  Enya Biznass, and Dulce De Mentia for coming up this morning and making our day.